I've never really done anything like this before but i'd assume it's almost like an online diary so thats what i'm going to use it as....
Today was the first day I have had to willing had to say goodbye to someone I love...possibly forever...Today Tim moved to LA and for those of you who don't know Tim he's the guy I have been with for pretty much the past year minus the fiasco that happened in the summer...but we don't talk about that...He was supposed to move in March with i still wasn't taking lightly but I was dealing with it considering it was still a while a away and recently he got a job offer that moved the up date to 2 weeks and than last week I found out I only had one more short week with him...I only got to see him 2 more times before he moved :( Last night I baked him cuppycakes considering he won't be here on valentines day anymore i figured i would give him he little gifts before he left so I made those and wrote out "a bible" as he called it in a card...which by the way the card was awesome it was sparkly and shiny :) went to bruno's til he was ready for me to come over after running a little late...like always ;)...I went to his house...he kinda beat up his car a little by driving into a frozen snow pile...he ended up cracking his bumper and knocking out his fog lights haha so we went inside and him and chris did what they needed to do while michelle and i sat and talked shit about customer service reps and targets refund policies (if your don't already know target sucks balllllls) and finally Tim and I went on with what we had to do which included going to Walgreens at like 12am and get vacuum bag and rope and then we went to his friend adam's house so he could finish editing some tattoo video for some show so look for adam on a tattoo show sooner or later!!! the video came out pretty awesome despite the creepy joker tattoo at the end haha jk its actually really cool...then after leaving adam's we went to LT to return some stuff...let me tell you school are fuggin creepy as shit at night...u hear things that arn't there haha...finally we get back to Tim's at like 3 in the morning and start packing everything...it really didn't seem real just seemed like he was overpacking for vaca or something...after getting everything packed and moved to the kitchen and then to his car we finally got to lay down for a little bit...it was about 4:30-4:45 before we got to the couch at first I couldnt sleep but I eventually did...and before we knew it we were waking up at like 7:30...He wanted to leave at 6 so now he's behind schedule...not uncommon haha...after finishing putting everything in his car we had to say our goodbye...or as I like to call it...our see ya...it wasnt as hard as I thought it would be at first...seemed like i was just going home for the day but i would be seeing him tonight when i went to the coffee house...slowly it started sinking in that i wasn't....this was it...who knows when the next time I am going to see him is...I gave him his v-day presents and we hugged...i didnt want to let go cause i knew i wouldnt be getting another one for a long time...after we hugged for a while i got my stuff together and had to get going home...he walked me to the door and we hugged again and I got my last kiss from him...that was the hardest...as i was walking out i realized i didnt have my phone...so i went back in to go get it...turns out it was in my purse so i got another kiss and hug and actually had to leave...all i could thing about was all the love movies ive ever seen wishing he would run after me...or i should run back in and tell him i love him or something over dramatic like that...but that stuff only happens in movies...never real life...so of course i start bawling as i'm walking to my car which it all of 10 ft away...and i cry the whole way home and pretty much havent stopped yet...and considering tomorrow is going to suck major ass and i only can rely on my family for comfort now...the next couple months are going to be rough...after getting home and crying myself to sleep for a little bit michelle called me and invited me to lunch with her bobby and aaiden...figuring it would be good to get out of the house for a little bit i went we had B-dubs and then got ice cream at coldstone which is exactly what i needed...i came home and then drove emmy to her friends house and ive been in my room typing this and crying pretty much since then....i didnt think that it would be this hard to say bye to him and the sad part is....it hasnt even fully hit me yet that he is gone...and not just at his house hanging out or on a vacation... god help me after its been a few weeks...who knew anything could be this hard...
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